Rude People on the Bus

I'm a bus rider. I like not having to worry about parking, traffic, stupid drivers, etc. I like having time to just sit on the way to work, read a book or magazine, what have you.

But one thing I can't stand is (I'm sure you've guessed it) rude people.

There's not a lot of room on a bus - they try to make them fit as many people as possible, for obvious reasons. So when I'm sitting in an outside seat and I have to get off, the person sitting on the inside seat should stand up and get out of the way so I can do so, right?

Apparently not. Too often I get stuck with that person who just pulls their knees up or scoots to the side. I'm tempted to brush my ass in their face as I go by sometimes, just so they get the idea.

End of Friends

Well, 'tis a sad day in TV land. Not quite as sad as when Fox cancelled John Doe, but still very sad. Friends is going off the air. And, of course, all people can talk about is what's going to happen with Ross and Rachel.

Am I alone in the world of Friends' fans in that I couldn't care LESS what happens to Ross? I was seriously hoping for Rachel and Joey to get together, or hell, even Rachel and Phoebe. Ross annoys the living piss out of me. If he was someone I ran into at work, I'd probably hate his guts. But no, America's all agog about the possibility of Ross and Rachel getting together finally, and you know that NBC isn't going to do something smart like let Ross get run over by a bus or something.

Well, as much as I'll miss Chandler and Joey, I guess it's okay for Friends to be ending. The show has pretty much done all it can, and they've done it with class, style, and some pretty great comedy.

Now John Doe, on the other hand...

Songs From My Noggin

Unfortunately, it's "Oh, Yes, Wyoming" from the Jerry Seinfeld/Superman website.

Clone this!

Read an article on Yahoo this morning from Reuters about the movie Godsend, which is apparently about human cloning. They did a pretty clever marketing technique with the movie's website, in that they created a website for a "Cloning Clinic" with links to the movie's webpage.

The article is here, and the clinic's website is here.

Apparently, there are people calling for this website to be shut down because it's too controversial. Folks, just read what's there and poke around, and you'll discover that it's for the movie! I found eight or so links to the movie on the FRONT PAGE ALONE.

There are also some folks who are upset because they think the site is insensitive to those who've lost a loved one. Well, you know, there are always going to be things that remind us of times of sorrow. The only way to get over such things is to deal with the sorrow and move on. I've had sorrow in my life, and I've dealt with it and moved on. Most people do. If you CAN'T get over it alone, then find help.

Finally - let's look at first amendment rights. There is NOTHING that says people have a right not to be offended. If anything, people specifically do NOT have that right. The right to free speech and freedom of expression precludes that, without a doubt. I may not like to hear some moron ranting about how the environment is fine, but he has the right to say it. I then have the right to point out what an brainless prat he is, naturally.

It's JUST a website for a movie. Deal with it.

More Laziness

Another sign that America is getting too lazy: They actually make briefcases with rollers now - in case your BRIEFCASE is too heavy.

Ladies and gentlemen, the day your briefcase is too heavy is the day you need to head back into the gym or at least do some pushups.

I'll get you started. Order the book "Combat Conditioning" from this guy: Matt Furey. For those of you who want to get REALLY fit, and I'm not just talking lifting weights and getting big, cosmetic muscles, but actually STRONGER, buy this guy's stuff. And follow his program. I'm doing it and I've never felt better.

Songs From My Noggin

"Boot to the Head" - the Frantics

It's enough to make you get weepy...

Crew season is ALMOST HERE!

Songs from My Noggin

"Crossed-Eyed Mary" - Jethro Tull

The Return of Superman... and Seinfeld?

This cracked me up a LOT. Check out this link from, of all places, American Express. The whole concept of Superman with ADD, basically, was too damn funny.

No Pants Day!

First, there was Talk Like A Pirate Day which I totally support, and now they've come up with No Pants Day! Apparently this year it's May 7th. I suppose... run out and take off your pants on that day.

No Pants Day.com has a quiz that tells you what you should be wearing on this august day (not AUGUST... it's in May). Here's what I got... not sure I'm ready for that.

You Should Wear Your Girlfriend's Panties! She won't know what to think about this, but it will be worth it. Tip: if you can't keep the goods tucked away, try chilling them with ice first. Find out which No Pants Day outfit YOU should wear! No Pants Day is May 7th, 2004. To find out more about No Pants Day, visit www.NoPantsDay.com

I was actually thinking of wearing a kilt...

NCAA Tournament? Feh. Give Me the U.S. Open Cup...

Just read an editorial (if you can call an opinionated sports article an "editorial") today about how the NCAA basketball tournament captures the spirit of America more than any other sporting event. I beg to differ.

Perhaps it doesn't have the same attraction because of what sport it is, but I think the U.S. Open Cup has more of an all-American feel to it than the NCAAs. Let me explain...

The NCAA tournament is made up of college teams. PERIOD. No exceptions to that rule. Therefore, anyone playing on these teams was probably recruited for their playing ability to play at a University, where their needs are taken care of via scholarships.

Let's look at the makeup of most American soccer teams. Now, I'm not talking about MLS here (though some of what I'm about to say applies to players there, too). American soccer players are, for the most part, semi-professional players at best. Your typical A-League, D3 League, etc. player has to have another job at the very least just to make ends meet. Soccer is played because it's a passion, a love for the sport. Some of these guys put their lives on hold for the chance to play soccer at a high level.

Second, let's look at the leagues themselves. MLS and the A-League are full-fledged professional leagues, though they certainly don't make any where near the money of the big four sports. The D3 League is semi-professional. The PDL is made up of college students who need teams to play on in their college offseasons (to a large extent). And then there are the amateur teams, which can be anything from a bar team to a team made up of immigrants to group of pals who play in a city league. Any of these teams can take place in the U.S. Open Cup - as long as they're good enough and can get into an entry tournament of some kind.

Third, let's look at the sports themselves. By and large, basketball players have to be tall. If you're not a tall hoopster, and that's rare, then you need some other skill to fall back on to survive your scholarship. But soccer players can come in all sizes - towering defenders, nimble midfielders, rough and hard-charging wingers, speedy opportunistic forwards, or any number of combinations thereof. Jon Busch, goalkeeper for the Columbus Crew, is one of the better keepers in that league yet stands a whole 5' 10" in a position normally reserved for the giants of the league. Mamadou Diallo, a former leading scorer in MLS, was a monster player at forward, where you usually have smaller, faster guys. And the variations go on.

That's the beauty of soccer - it doesn't matter how big or small you are, it's how you play the game. If you can do something special with the body you've been given, you'll be a success. And that's what America is all about - doing what you can with what you have.

If that's not the American spirit at its best, I don't know what is.

Ch-ch-ch-ch-CHANGES...

You'd never think that four words could have so huge an impact on your life as to change your outlook completely, but they can.

"We're having a baby."

My wife Jennifer hadn't been feeling particularly well the past couple weeks, and after a friend of ours reported that she was pregnant, that started Jenn thinking. So... she stopped at the drug store, picked up a little test, and BINGO - our lives are changed forever.

Obviously, we've done the doctor thing at this point so we know it's for sure, but I'm still reeling from the news that I'm going to be a dad. It's been fun telling folks, but at the same time it's very intimidating to realize that this time next year I'm going to be helping to take care of a new life, a life that's going to be relying on me for pretty much everything.

Tends to sober you up quite a bit, eh?

Songs from My Noggin

"Sweet Dreams Are Made Of These" by the Eurythmics

Songs from My Noggin

"Stand" - R.E.M.

Backfire?

Been about a month since I posted here, just saw something that made me laugh out loud.

Some organization called "The American Family Association" sent me a request to be polled, so I did. It was a presidential poll, with John Kerry, Ralph Nader, and the Great Pretender on the list of possibilities. So, naturally, I responded with John Kerry as I plan to vote for him and get the Shrub out of office. After the poll was over, I got the results thus far.

John Kerry: 90.05%
George Bush: 3.64%
Ralph Nader: 6.32%

Smiling, I thought "You know, I don't even know who the American Family Association is." So I checked out their website... they're a right-wing freak-job bunch - with issues on their site like "The Homosexual Agenda" and "Church In America." I hope they look at these results they're getting and cry like babies.