My Best Halloween Costume Was...

Following my wife's lead on this one:

As a kid, I had a great number of fantastic costumes. My folks liked to help me put together good costumes. I suppose the best one I had was when I was a Gaul (a la Asterix the Gaul) - with a horned helmet, breastplate, round shield, sword, furry tunic, the whole nine yards. Looked sharp.

As an adult, I've put together some interesting ones - including the Shadow and the Crow, but probably my most innovative idea was when I was I-270 - the outerbelt for Columbus. From head to toe, it was a construction helmet, black shirt and pants with lane divider lines in tape on my arms and legs, a cardboard "Orange Barrel," and an interstate logo on my front and back. I was the scariest costume at the party. :)

OSU vs. Michigan 2? No Way!

Now that USC has lost a game and there are only two quality undefeated teams left in the country in Michigan and Ohio State, we've started to hear a lot of talk about how, after one of them inevitably loses to the other when they play later this season, they should get a rematch in a bowl game for the national title.

And I call foul. Once those two teams have played once, that should be it. You've proved which team is better via head-to-head play. Assuming that there is another undefeated team in the country at that point, that team should get the shot. Combine that with the fact that OSU has played ONE quality team all year (and no offense to my wife, who's a Longhorns fan, but Texas was over-rated coming into this season, thus diminishing OSU's accomplishment at being undefeated thus far) and you need to give other teams a chance.

Add to this that the rule of thumb in the past is that teams who lose late in the season traditionally get less of a shot than teams who lose early in the season at the top bowl games and high end-of-season rakings. Case in point: Notre Dame in 1993 (the year of the big Florida State win). ND was penalized by the voters heavily for losing their late game to Boston College in the final rankings, despite beating the team who was voted the national champion and having an identical record.

"But that was before the BCS," you counter. The point is the same: end-of-season rankings decide which teams go to which bowl games. And when OSU or Michigan lose that final game, they should drop far enough down that they don't get another shot at the top game. A team who lost earlier in the seaon - an Auburn, Notre Dame, Texas, etc. should get that shot instead of a team who lost late. If there is any sense of consistency in the unspoken rules of NCAA football rankings, then that's how it should work out (if there isn't another unbeaten BCS team at that point, and there should be one at the most.

Now We Know Who To Blame

The inventor of the most annoying "cheer" in sports fandom - the Wave - has come out of the proverbial closet and revealed himself. This goes right up there with "cornhole" at tailgate parties as things that annoy the piss out of me for no real good reason.

Fire breaks out at Salt Lake crematorium

I can't even comment on this. Um...yeah.

Santorum And Tolkien - A Match Made in... um... the Shire? Mordor?

Sometimes the ruling elite need to just realize that hey... you're not cool. So don't try to be cool. This video (sent to me by brother Rob), which discusses Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum's comments about how the War in Iraq is like Lord of the Rings demonstrates this perfectly.



The best example of this, of course, remains Boris Yeltsin's attempts to appear hip with the kids by dancing with a band at a Russian music festival. True comedy genius.



I haven't seen moves like this since watching my son dancing to "Quack Quack Quack Cock-a-doodle-doo" by the Wiggles.

Keith Olbermann Tells George Bush What a Fascist He Is

MSNBC's Keith Olbermann has, once again, become a pundit worthy of being lauded among such great men as Bill Moyers and Edward R. Murrow as he calls our attention to the national travesty that is the new Military Commissions Act. This act allows the government to suspend Habeas Corpus for anyone who is considered an "unlawful enemy combatant."

Now, with a government who publicly states that anyone who criticizes this regime (it's no longer just an administration, it's truly a regime now) is "providing aid and comfort to our enemies", who's to say just who is and isn't an "unlawful enemy combatant?"

And here's another thought: considering that the UN invoked international law to forbid the invasion of Iraq and we did it anyway, doesn't that make George W. Bush and his regime "unlawful combatants?" So should they have their Habeas Corpus suspended?

I'm looking forward to watching the ACLU challenge this one on Constitutional grounds. Article One, Section Nine of that esteemed document states:

"The Privilege of the Writ of Habeas Corpus shall not be suspended, unless when in Cases of Rebellion or Invasion the public Safety may require it."

The last I saw, we weren't being invaded by anyone. And we're not in an open rebellion. So this act should die an ignoble death fairly quickly.

But thank you, Mr. Olbermann, for calling America's attention to this travesty. We now have complete confirmation just how George W. Bush feels about America and the Constitution that HE SWORE to uphold and defend.

Watch the video below for his complete comments.

---

Bad Luck Doesn't Get Much Worse Than This

You don't get much unluckier than this. The initial reaction is to blame the keeper, but this is just a divot on the field, it seems. Poor guy, people are going to remember this for years.

As much as I enjoy ripping on the over-rated English team, this was not their fault. It was just bad luck. "Blind stupid simple doo-dah clueless luck!"

Top 10 Worst Cartoon Characters

This is one of my all-time favorite email forwards. We were just watching the Scooby Doo movie, and I decided to try to find this and post it for all to see. Enjoy!

---

The top ten worst cartoon characters:

#10 Tweety Bird
You know there's a problem when every single kid roots for the "hero" to be devoured in each episode. No sense of humor. No personality. Annoying voice. Plus he was always tattling. I knew kids like this growing up. Most of them ate paste, sat in the front of the bus, and got me in trouble.

#9 Grape Ape
A real moron. All he knows how to say is his name. And he does so non-stop for a half an hour. I'd rather watch "Davey and Goliath covet their neighbor's model airplane."

#8 Olive Oyl
Am I the only one out there who thought this was one lady NOT worth fighting over? And that's what they did every episode! She talks like Edith Bunker and looks like a pipe cleaner with a cheap hat. Hey, Popeye, you're a sailor... you can do better! Plus Olive can never decide if she wants to date that jerk Bluto or not. The girl is just bad news.

#7 Petunia Pig
Remember her? Porky's girlfriend? She was a real zero. What was the point of her anyway? To make Porky look good? Come on, who did they think they're fooling. We all know Porky is gay.

#6 Pebbles & Bam-Bam, as teenagers
What were they thinking? Were they trying to cash in on the "Joanie loves Chachi" thing? And how come every cartoon teenager plays in a crumby rock band? An awful -- and thankfully shortlived -- idea.

#5 Pepe LePew
Hello, Warner Brothers, ever heard of sexual harassment? Let's take a good look at this character; a horny, rapist skunk who's attracted to other species! NOT good for the kids. Plus, worse still, he's French.

#4 Alan, from Josie and the Pussy Cats
How weak was this "Fred" clone? They even gave him an ascot, for crying out loud. Well, I knew Fred. I grew up with Fred. Fred was like a friend of mine. Let me tell you something...you're no Fred.

#3 Zan and Zana, the Wondertwins
How many times do we have to say it? Leave the crimefighting to the professionals! "Form of... an idiot!" They should have been voted out of the Hall of Justice a long time ago. There's no room for dead weight in this game.

#2 Kazoo, from the Flintstones
It's like "Hmmm, a miniature, green spaceman who appears only to Fred Flintstone isn't enough of a stretch. I know! Let's give him a snotty London accent!" Um, could I get a drug test from Hanna Barbara, please?

#1 Scrappy Doo
And, really, who else COULD it be? This guy ruined Scooby Doo! Just came in and ruined it! Scrappy is the Yoko Ono of Saturday morning cartoons. I can't even talk about it anymore. It's too upsetting.

Let Your Kids Play!

One of the most disturbing trends I've seen for parents these days is the tendency to get them involved in nothing but structured activities from the time they can walk to the time they graduate from high school. I've always thought that you need to give kids time to be kids and find out for themselves what their strengths, weaknesses, and interests are.

A lot of this goes back to when I was coaching youth soccer with my friend Shane. Shane's philosophy, which I shared, was that you gave the kids the fundamentals of the game, and then let them teach themselves how to play it. We'd sit and watch coaches who screamed and yelled from the sidelines the entire game (and that's to say nothing of the idiot parents who did the same, or worse), not letting the kids learn how to play the game for themselves, and shake our heads. Our kids always seemed to play with more enthusiasm, and to be very honest, do better on the field, than the kids who were spoonfed the entire soccer experience.

As I've become a parent, I've definitely seen the wisdom of this attitude. We read lots of books to Duncan, but never once did we drop him in front of one of those ridiculous Baby Einstein videos or the like. If Duncan wanted to watch TV, like the Wiggles or whatever, then we made sure he was doing it actively - getting up and doing the dances and singing the songs, etc. But TV has never been a huge part of his day like it is for some (or, I daresay, MOST) kids.

I think our neighborhood is very much in agreement with the way we do things, too - I see kids out in their yards playing a lot when I'm coming home from work - and that makes me pretty sure that we picked the right part of town in which to live. I want Duncan to be able to discover life on his own terms (as much as he can safely do that) and not have it spoonfed to him by some well-meaning but totally misguided adult.

So read this article, and if you're packing your kids' schedules with more activities than they need, stop. Let them go outside and play!

New Poll Show Pirates Considered More Ethical Than Congress

Brother Tom passed this one along to me. It pretty much just confirms what most of us knew all along... though I think Representative Hastert's assertions about the surging popularity of the buccaneer class do not answer all the questions.

(For more background on this story, click here).

Bush is Working To Keep You In Jail, No Questions Asked

Keith Olbermann reports on the Bush Administration's attempts to change the law to allow the suspension of Habeas Corpus in times other than periods of rebellion or invasion.

Um... isn't that in the CONSTITUTION, which the President is supposed protect and defend (and which he has sworn to do TWICE, at each of his swearing-in ceremonies)?

(For those of you unclear on the concept of Habeas Corpus, basically it's the right of any prisoner to request and receive a hearing/trial to question the legality of the imprisonment. More here.)

U.S. assistant coach Myernick dies

A major figure in US Soccer over the past two World Cups - beloved by fans and the whole nine yards. Mooch, you will be missed.

Retired S1Ws Recalled To Active Duty

It's sad that it came down to this. But my brother Rob had to show this to me so I'm spreading the word.

Whacko Georgia Mother Tries to Ban Harry Potter

Yep, the deluded paranoiacs are still at it, folks...